It’s a mess.
A hot mess.
If you were to compliment me on my hair, you better believe I will proudly say, “thank you”. I may even hug you. It’s hard work to tame this mane.
My niece seems to have inherited the crazy hair gene as well. The other day I went over to her house in the morning and her hair was… well… a mess. I couldn’t help but smile when I saw her and then, as if she knew what I was smiling about, she said, “I don’t know why my hair gets so messy.” It was like she was saying, “Excuse my mess”.
Yes, it can get quite messy but, really, she has beautiful hair. It’s a beautiful brown color, it’s not too thin and not too thick.
So, what if it’s a little messy?
I went on to tell her that I have the same problem. As frustrating as my hair can be, it’s nothing a flat iron and straightening serum or a quick scrunch and curling spray can’t fix.
Later on I thought about my interaction with my niece and I felt kind of bad. I hoped she didn’t think I was laughing at her or that I thought there was something wrong with her hair. I didn’t want her to think that she had to excuse her hair.
It was the first thing in the morning, she hadn’t even brushed it yet. Of course it was messy. No one’s hair looks good first thing in the morning.
We all have messy hair. And that’s ok.
This got me thinking about other messes in our lives and how often we feel the need to excuse them. Or worse, hide them. I’m not talking about our messy homes, kids, cars or desks. Though, we often feel the need to excuse those.
I’m talking about our messy lives.
None of us are immune to messes.
None of us wakes up with perfect hair.
I wish more of us would realize this. I wish more of us would be honest with each other and say, “Hey, my hair’s a mess, too!”
Instead, it’s like we walk around with perfect hair, unwilling to admit just how long it took to get it that way – how many products, how much time and how much money have been put into straighter hair, curlier hair, blonder hair and less gray hair.
It’s the same with the messes of our lives. It takes time, energy and even money (therapy anyone?) to deal clean up these messes. I wish more of us would show each other what we’ve done to overcome our messes or to thrive in spite of them instead of acting as if they aren’t there.
Instead of “excuse my mess”, I wish more of us would learn to say, “Here’s my mess.”
For it is when we are willing to share our messes that we receive healing; we find restoration; we enter into authentic relationships.
Here’s my mess.
Check out more posts on the prompt “mess” at the #wholemama challenge.